this is going to get so much harder

** sook blog **

Dads going over seas tomorrow apparently, so that means im back to babysitting and working. Id have no time for my boyfriend or my friends. This is going to be so hard on me i swear my parents just dont understand. you know if I dont see him enough he'll probs get bored of me and break up like i think hes having doubts already, you know i really want to fall in love im craving love. i dont want my parents to ruin something for me that iv never experienced iv never had a real boyfriend iv never commited myself to one person so strong before. they cant ruin this for me. I need a fucking life I need to get out there and see my friends. Its his birthday this weekend and I cant even attend it that hurts me so much i cant stop crying. i feel so insecure and alone why is everything in life so hard when we were going so strong.

hangovers and cheap conversations

Sooo i was really foolish lastnight and I went out got piss blind then went to this one club and bam got my ID taken off me so I went home and sooked lucky i didnt get fined but still i feel so guttered and i feel so bad erghhhhh i feel erghh thats what im feeling right now, mann my boyfriends going to be so pissed off with me eh.

help! i feel alive.

Ahhh iv been working so much and been just going to bed so i havnt updated in like 3 days and i also havnt been home. ahh my throats so sore its been sore for about a week now rahhh. i think im going to go to bed got workies tomorrow and then going out tmoorrow night and getting that fucking drunk weooww i havnt been out in agess so im so keen for tomorrow night hey!
love love xx

young love?

so my new boyfriend said to me today.

' so you reckon you love me '

i replied back with, 'no. not yet whys that?'

he told me he was just asking so i replied back with,

' oh ok then i just believe falling in love will take time and we talked about it the other day, baby we will fall in love one day..

besides you cant love someone in such short time. i believe i wont fall in love for at least a year or so. well anyways, what do i know about love. im just drunk with lust

i have ears and eyes all over

He told me if i fuck up I only get one chance.

.. and he will always find out

baby were gonna fall in love with eachother one day..

oh how those words captured me, i hope so.
i really do.

the other day i had to stop and think, and boy i love the way you get to me.

lalala i dont have much to say, went to work this arvo did a few hours setting tables setting up for tomorrow nights event of 500 people + yew not happy im missing out on halloween but oh well i just saved myself $200 in costume and alcohol and a hangover ah well. how come every person i tell i have a boyfriend and they dont support me tell me it wont last or are so shocked that i tegan sutherland have a boyfriend im spewin' hey. im happy for once and no one believes on me or accepts that.

ill prove you all wrong i can do it, i can make it work. Its all me this time.

thats all for tonight x